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Poems By Poet Jeffrey Lee  7/13/2014 12:28:10 PM
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  Best Poems From
  JEFFREY LEE
 
 
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  5.     

To my children

To my children
My future
May you find happiness
In this world of darkness

I write this poem
For you,
You, who I have not met
Nor probably will ever meet

I write in the hopes that you
Will not repeat the same mistakes as I
Nor of those who have came before

You are the future
Born from centuries of ideas
Wars, conflicts, and hope

You are the future
That people have fought for
And have also died for

You are the future
That will continue on
Living, growing, thinking,
And achieving the impossible

You are my children
You are my hope
And you are the endless future
Which I can’t even dream to comprehend

So don’t waste your life
Wondering what if
And don’t get hung up
On the trivial past

Only look forward to tomorrow
And live your life
For your children
And your children’s children

Because they are the future
And we are but stepping-stones
Building for a greater tomorrow
 
Jeffrey Lee
   
 

   
   
 

  6.     

Box Full Of Memories

A shoebox full of dusty memories
Full of bad poems and faded pictures
That should have been burned years ago

Old flimsy year books with little stains on the cover
With old forgotten friends safely tucked inside
Still smiling, unaware of how sad life was going to be

Crumpled pieces of paper, with half written words
Aimlessly searching for the words my heart couldn’t say
Yet I couldn’t throw them away, still caring what they said

And a single red rose, now wilted away
The last one I almost gave to her on that lonely Valentines day
But I knew, that it wouldn’t be alone, as it drowned in a sea of others

I picked up the cover, to put the memories away
And I found a wish, scribbled on the back
“I wish she knew, how much I loved her.”
 
Jeffrey Lee
   
 

   
   
 

  7.     

Legal Suicide

Blowing out the smoke
As if they were all my troubles
And watching them all
Quickly drift and fade away

I breathe in the grey death
Hoping it will kill all the troubles
That I’ve held on to for so long
But all it does is kill me

I take a comfort in the thought
That I now have once less breath to take
One less thought in the burrows of my mind
One less moment obsessed with regret

Before I know it, the embers reach their end
As I take one long last breathe in
I remember all the little troubles of the day
And I just blow it all out
 
Jeffrey Lee
   
 

   
   
 

  8.     

My Confession

I'm not going to lie. I have thought about ending it, many, many, times. But surprisingly I'm still here. No matter how bad the feelings get. No matter how bad I want to yell from the depths of my soul. No matter how bad I want to tear and gnaw the skin from my flesh. Or want to break my fist against the hard surface of the world.
I am still here. Still waking up in the middle of the night. Still lying in the darkness, listening to the wind and rain against the window pain. Still waking up from the worlds of old faces and from lives that were never meant to be. I am still here. I am still here. I am still here.
It has been years since my last confession. Or maybe more truthfully. This is my first. I am torn between hating the world, and wishing I could save it. I am still in love with her. But at the same time I know, I am not in love with her. I am in love with the fiction of her I created. The fiction of the memories, as well as my own unquenched desires. Growing and fading throughout the long stretches of years, trying to grasp old memories, moments when we were almost together. And trying to forget everything else in between. The sweaty hands, the endless hours of staring up at the clouds and blue sky, trying not to look at her, Always trying to figure out what to say, what to say, what to say. Always imagining that she might have felt the same. As we sat alone in that old school parking lot day after day.
It's funny how I always think back to those moments. When life begins to dim. And always wish that I could have gone back and said something, anything. Just so I could have seen where the path would have taken us. I know deep down it probably wouldn't have worked out. I know that she would have still found someone else. I know that we would still end up going our separate ways. And that everything would have ended up the exact same way it has now. But deep inside, I still wanted to try. I still want to try. But it's too late. Much too late. And it is something I will hold in me till the day I die. But for now, I am still here.
I am still here. Stepping through the days, making memories with friends, settling with what I have, instead of drowning in what I don't. Maybe my father was right. And I "should just be happy with what I have." Settling for second or third place, instead of reaching for the gold, only to lose it all and end with nothing. I know I can be content with third place. I know she is everything I had ever wanted in a girl. I know she is the smart choice. But still I find that she is not her.
I am still here. I am still alone, and not alone. I am still in love with my fiction of the past. I am happy, and still unhappy. I am still here, and I don't know where I am going.
 
Jeffrey Lee
   
 
 
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Poems By Poet Jeffrey Lee